Capturing the Now

As we near the end of this rather tumultuous year, I cannot help but feel incredibly fortunate. In addition to all the ways in which I am fortunate in the most important ways (plenty of food, good health insurance, a comfortable home come most immediately to mind), every time I accept and work on a photoshoot, I feel like the luckiest person alive.

I simultaneously feel, every time, like this is something I’m meant to do and yet also an imposter. I also always feel like every shoot could be my last.

For years, those feelings have kept me from accepting many photoshoots. Because I was scared, I said no a lot.

I have glaucoma, and while that truly did prevent me from taking photographs for a while, for many years I have continued to shy away from photography for fear of what could happen rather than what was true right now.

This year, I have just started saying yes. I’m leaning in rather than pulling away. Doing so, I was lucky enough to accept eleven photoshoots this fall.

Each one felt like a gift.

I’m still scared, and yet by leaning into that fear, I am able to experience joy, feel passion, and embrace hope.

I absolutely love everything about taking photographs (well, except worrying about the weather), and I am thrilled to be persuing this scary, exciting, fun, creative, fulfilling endeavor regardless of where it leads or how long it lasts.

The connection that develops while photographing people is unparalleled and intoxicating.

I feel like I get a special pass into what makes each family unique. I fall in love with everyone. Every time.

Every photoshoot is a careful balance between being fun, personal, and engaging while ensuring that I am actually taking technically decent photographs.

That balance is unbelievably difficult sometimes and I know I have a lot to learn. But, each time I say yes instead of no, I get another opportunity to learn, connect, capture, and embrace each moment.

It is thrilling and I know no high quite like it.

None of us knows what lies ahead. I’m so grateful I can capture the now for people.

I feel incredibly lucky to be in that position.

Happy Holidays! I wish you peace, love, and joy this season. Thank you for being a part of my life.

Also: Jocelyn sent me a brand new Knit-Chek! All the way from Alaska!

I am perhaps unreasonably excited about this, especially since my replacement Boye gauge ruler, while completely functional, just wasn’t the same… I am elated and grateful and ready to measure all the things. Thank you so much, Jocelyn!

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